The God Squad: Which lover do we pick after death?

I do not believe that they are jealous of each other, nor do I believe that they are upset with us that we had the courage to fall in love again after their passing. If they truly loved us, they would want us to find new love to ease the pain of being without them. What I think is happening to you is that you're still broken by grief and need some time to let your lover go.

Don't force the issue. When you are ready to give yourself in selfless love to another person, you will know what to do and your past love will not keep you from future joy.

Q: I can't get myself to pray for my dead friend because I don't know his address! He might be happy or he might be hot, if you get my drift. Help me figure this out please.

— Anonymous

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A: Judaism teaches that the prayers of the living for the deceased go into the prayer's list of good deeds and help during the spiritual debriefing our souls go through after death. In my mind, a better and more accessible reason to pray for the dead is to help us balance our grief with gratitude. Our prayers help to focus our souls and our minds on the good works of our dearly departed. In that way, we avoid the natural danger of focusing only on the pain of what has been taken from us and not also on our gratitude for what we have been given. Prayer for the dead is an essential act of spiritual balancing.

Q: What's the religious point of view on mediums?

— J., Long Island, N.Y.

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